_my love for you;

HATRED

Saturday, December 31, 2005

Why? Why? Why??? I was this close to step into a relationship.. But it all didnt happen. I prevent it. Well, not because im being choosy here. It's just... something that i dont really like.. It's ok if i dont have a boyfriend. Atleast, i still have my friends.
I wrote something yesterday after we ended our conversation.

Read it and think...

The more i think about you
I felt love and wanna be your Boo
There's nothing i could do
Just to fall in love with you

At first i thought you are cool
But no, you got me fooled
And i thought
There's nothing i could do
But only to hate you

You sweet-talked me and make me high
Then i knew it was all a lie
There's nothing i could do
But only to hate you

By your side i felt so warm and relax
But not until you ask for sex
There's nothing i could do
But to hate you and leave you

I thought you were different from other guys
But then i realised
You make me full of disgust
There's nothing i could do
But to hate you and leave you

I dont care about the consensus
I risk all the consequences
There's only one thing i could do
To leave you and forget all about you.

-Fieza-

Hhhmm..maybe it's not that good but i tried. Hahah.. What do u think??

-Sign Off @ 11:03 AM :)

Doing Script

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Nothin better to do today.. Went to Esplanade to do my script. Guess what???
I forgot to bring my pencil case and that item is like the most important thing in the list. What the hell. I cant write without any writing equipment. Duhh! Silly me...

So, what i did was to find any shop which sell pen. hahah..Pen hunting! Seriously.. it's a very..very.. easy job..hahah...
Finally, when i bought this one stupid pen which took my life away.. hahah..not that badlah..it's just that im so dried up. No cash.
After writing and plan out some scenes, i went to Bugis to find myself a belt with A butterfly buckle but i couldnt find any.. If any of u happen to see it in any shop please tell me..Thanxs!

Right now, feeling kind of lonely without my sis. She's having 'a four days camp'. Ya right! Hmmm..but im feeling great though cause i dont have to shout at her. All i have to do is to do my chores quietly. Peace..

New Year is coming and everybody are busy thinking about their resolution and i.. I only have one resolution in mind that is to pass and my driving licence by next year. Hahah.. Great one right?

**Im waiting for the LKY project..when will it happen??

-Sign Off @ 3:55 PM :)

Family Matters

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

I love it when my parents are at home. Minus off da noises that they make every single daylah. One good thing about my family is that we always enjoy going out together. Im thankfull to them. Not all teenagers (im still a teen right??) spend time with their families u know..

From what i've seen, they prefer going out with their friends instead of family. No offence. Am i suppose to be ashame for being with my family then friends???

We had dinner at this Japanese Restaurant called Ramen Ten at Jubilee Ang Mo Kio. I ordered Spicy Ramen Lala. D-E-L-I-CIOUS!!! Love it! Hot and spicy. We were given the opportunity to order what we like. Ordered salmon sushi and etc.. Ouh, and i had wafer with vanila ice-cream..Yummy!! After 1 month plus of irregular meal, i was delighted.
Thanxs Dad! And u too Mum!

-Sign Off @ 2:19 PM :)

my parents home

Sunday, December 25, 2005

The end of my happy moments of freedom...my parents came home from Brunei today.. We pick them up at Changi Airport at 230 pm today. OMG! Suddenly, my house is polluted with noises. Noises maade from my mum and dad...they started to nag and nag and nag. I managed to clear up da mess in my room, lucky me..

Hmmm...when they are away, u felt lost but when they're home, they make too much noise. i couldnt stand it. Now, cant use da phone late night. Haiz. Hell..

They said that they'll be goin again and that i'll(da devil in me) be looking forward to it. Hahahah..

-Sign Off @ 2:23 PM :)

relieved..

Friday, December 23, 2005

PIC paper was suck. Dont think i'll score.. So i dont wanna talk about it..

It was raining heavily today and so after paper we were stuck in da school canteen waiting for da rain to calm down. Well it doesnt took tt long but

I thought, i will never get to ride bicycle with Saliza and Nadz cause da rain was bad. But at 3pm da rain was pretty ok.. So i did met them.. and i get to ride..... They bully me just because im not pro. hahah.. Down da slide, up da slope.. and now, my butt hurts. Really an experience for me today. Got stuck in da middle of da road, lucky it is still green man u know..Thank God still love me.. hahah

Well, talk about this guy from friendster who wanted to get to know me(swear i didnt start it first), seriously, honestly, im already lazy to make friends and meet new people. I dont know why. Ouh ya..managed to know his height, hehehe. He said he's around 167..How do u girls think???(i know what u're gonna say di..heheh)

Supposed to meet him but both of us suddenly got something on. Last minute, Sam called and said he have one free ticket for me to theatre with him..well i can sense this is just to make me forgive him for what he had done to me a few days back. ya.. What everlah boi!

Still didnt know what actually happened to this guy name Sam.. He go crazy in da head. I meant his brain.. He just called and ask for forgiveness.. See what i meant before this paragraph?? Well.. im a forgiving type u know.. heheh...

-Sign Off @ 3:50 PM :)

Pretty Exciting huh...

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Went to school today and reached on time... Why?? Because we have PIC presentation today. Ouh Liyz. She called me and she thought that class starts at 12...Poor girl. Told her that class starts at 10 and she thought 10 is FYP.. and btw FYP canceled so that's why she thought class at 12.. heheh.. girl..girl..
But lucky she could make it on time before our turn..

During presentation was pretty exciting. Mr Paul asked a few questions. One of it was, what is direct market. First di answered that question cause i got blur and didnt know what is da actually meaning but i did tried to answer him after di does...haha.. i remembered i used da word "tumpang". It means lodge actually..haha..whateverlah..Atleast 2nd presentation was done.

Now, im stressing about tomorrows quiz. Not yet start with my notes and some research to be done. Haiz... Im gonna be so dead!

Oklah..think i've to go do some revision.. =) Good luck with da quiz!

-Sign Off @ 10:55 AM :)

My 1st practical training...

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

*Gigglin*
I so cant believe it tt i went for my 1st ever prac. Hmmm... i was nervous cause my instructor is a malay guy..but he turn up to be a nice and sporting type. Thank God.

I was actually blur today..as per normal, monday blues. Hehehe..
I first thought i dont have to drive on da first training and thought da instructor will be talking about da engine and all stuff about da car. I was wrong. I have to drive around and i've made a few rounds. Well, abit of stress with da pedal. Turning, i've got over it. Overall, it was fun! But, there was an emergency brake tt i've made just now. My instructor and i got panic. Wait! It's not my fault. He asked me to turn right but at da wrong time. Lucky i managed to break and he also did break using his emergency break. I dont blame him here. I quite like him, i meant his way of teaching. But i reserve my jugdment cause it's still early to tell.

Hmmm...January...
Im gonna be busy in January. He wants me to complete my practical in January. Well, i thought its a good idea too but i must take my prac before or after school. No choice. The problem is...my account have not enough $$$ yet... I've booked 9 trainings. Hopefully, my parents have da $$$ so i can fininsh my prac as soon as possible.

So.. today, i dont think im goin out. Just wanna stay at home and ouh ya...do my part in PIC...

-Sign Off @ 4:36 AM :)

Drama training

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Early in da morning, something happened.. my daughter(titi) go and scratch me on my left eyebrow... ofcourse im in terrible pain.. until i felt like havin a fever...

Still i did went for drama training but not as usuallah. I got slight headache due to da pain and ouh.. da first thing Najib told me as soon as i enter da classroom was, "Eh Fieza, asal niari make-up kau cam terlebih gitu..."

ok..i was fine but abit piss. Seriously, it'z not because of my make-up cause i didnt use any today. No blusher, No eye shadow, No eyeliner... Only powder and mascara which is a must for me when im outside.. First thing, maybe im not feeling well due to da scratch my cat gave. Second, i regreted for not wearing a blusher(cause today im too lazy to put it on). Thirdly, i did'nt pespire cause my bro drove me there with a full blast air-con(that makes our make-up look fresh).
Hhhmmm...that's my reasons...I dont know what u all will think.

Well, today's training was fun. We play with imaginations... hhmmm..cant believe myself that i actually focus and serious with da traing. i could feel da warmness in a desert, lonelyness without anyone all around and suddenly fell into a dark and deep hole. Calling out for help while da hole suddenly become smaller and smaller.. At that particular time i felt like really being squeeze. All thanxs to Sam for his gd job in organising da traning successfully! Applause.

I must admit something. I dont know why..in every traning, i dont seem to had enough of da training. Like, time pass by so damn fast and i dont get to really feel da training.. I want more. Maybe because it really interest me and im anxious to learn and look forward for new things in drama..

-Sign Off @ 3:40 PM :)

End school early

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Class end early...Faris decided to play pool...so Liyz went to my place to borrow my sis's jeans... meeting Faris and Fik at Lot 1...
So excited...heheh...
We played for an hour plus... after that we when for dinner at Long John Silver. Then, we thought of goin back home but it was raining and Fik cant make his way home... so we stay and play some Xbox game...
Really had a great time today guys!!!!

-Sign Off @ 2:16 PM :)

bowling awesome

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Today...da whole BIT students went for bolwling... Awesome!!! we won 3rd!!! Yey!! All thanxs to Jasper..hehe..he's very da good player u know...
After bowling, went upstairs to play pool... play a few games before i left da guys...

Reached home abt 5 plus...meet zira and liza..near my block while waiting for my sis to come back home with da house key...stupid...she got my keys.. not my fault that i didnt bring along my keys...it's because she wanted to meet her friend and help her with some stuff(i cant be bother to know what is it). She's late! 1hr late! i was damn piss..

After helping me with da house key, she left home again..she said she have to do some more stuff..yeah whatever..
She said, she had told my dad that she'll be late.
And i was stupid enough to be fool by her..
My dad called and told me she supposed to be home by 10pm. And, she only sms my dad telling him that she went out to do project.. my dad actually didnt allow her... so, itz kinda pissed me off cause he'll be shouting at me cause she's not home yet. He even scolded me and told me im not a responsible sis cause i didnt care abt her when she came home late... well da problem is my bro and i had tried to call her but her hp is off.. im so emotionally disturbed..
15mins to 12 and she's still not home yet.. im going to bed now...let my bro handle this shit...

-Sign Off @ 3:45 PM :)

Lost my script

Monday, December 12, 2005

Boohoo...sob* sob*
I lost my script...any of u gurlz saw my script??? i wrote it in pencil..
=( sorry Liyz i know u help me alot with it...and then its gone just like that...
If it's really missing then i've to redo it again... Sorry Liyz...

Today, i cook 'asam pedas ayam' but dont know da taste, taste like rendang and abit something wrong...God i dont know how to improve it.. Guess i always depend on my mum...
Mum.. miss u much!!!

-Sign Off @ 9:48 AM :)

Looking for a job

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Arrgh...today is fri and i have to be in school early..managed to reach early.. waited for da bus and then off we go to Macritchie..

Da moment we reached there we saw monkeys..hahah..im excited for sure. Ready to burn some calories..
We headed fo da HSBC tree top walk... Cool huh... Took a deep breath before walking on da bridge. so damn high.. im scared of height u know.. hahah.. Zana was disturbing us. She told us to look down and see da monkeys on da tree.. she said we should do so to enjoy full scenery.. =) i did take a peep below but i got dizzy.. =p so i walk straight..

We are da first few people to finish our walk.. Yey!! We have to wait for da rest of da people.. Lucky for us it was raining..unlike yesterday da admin students was walking under da hot sun.. its a pity...

Took a shower after i reached home..rest for a while cook maggi and eat...then got dress and went for interview at Toa Pa yo.. hell itz far, i thought it is near... Step in da office, saw alot of 'Minah'.. Oh God.. No mood to work in this kind of place...serious ah...Pay is $4/hr and its short hours like 11am-3pm.
In a month i dont think can reach more than $500 unlike Guardian.. =(
Some more its far...
Dont think i wanna work there..

Got my knee aches due to da walk..And then after interview, my couz and i go to town.. she wanna look for shoe and clothes.. Went home at 8pm.. Think im goin to sleep soon...too tired..

-Sign Off @ 2:01 PM :)

What the hell

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Ya today i went to accompany Yan to meet Sam at NP... She did call me early to tell me that she's going and that she'll be meeting me at BB interchange...

Later on, i recived this sms using her hp no. but Ian was sending it to me saying that she cant make it cause she need to settle 'their' problem. For instant my face went blur... and i went 'eerrr...ok'.. but what am i suppose to do as i already dressed up, just waiting for her call.

So what i did was to sit on the sofa reading newspaper and eat my 'kuih raya'.. still have it on my table..wondering when will all the cookies finish.
Btw...a few minutes later Yan call me using her friend's no. She wants me to meet her at BB MRT and went to meet Sam...so i did..

Both of them were actually quarrelling in public..HELLO.... cant u guys see there were so many people around looking at both of u???? I cant stand to see guys i mean bf beating up their gf...so pathetic right??? Dont understand guys nowadays...

Well..anyway, what we did was business plan and cash flow..

-Sign Off @ 3:38 PM :)

Lelembut

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Yey... just came back from watching a theatre entitled 'Lelembut' at Esplanade..
Lelembut means supernatural things such as ghost, demons..etc..
Very interesting way to bring up da story to da audience..they make used of a language which they themself created...cool huh...really admire them..hope i become like them...i mean..they are so talented..
Cant wait for my drama group to start a play...hahah...

After watching da drama, we when to have dinner at Long John Silver at Marina. Sam bought my dinner..hahah...yey..free dinner..honestly, im broke..

I realised today i didnt really talk to Sam..think im sick with him. Hahah...He got jealous when Najib sit with me in L.J...Whateverlah...
Lucky i managed to escape from going to Yishun CC to watch another show...im so tired.
But overall..i really enjoy 'Lelembut' but not being around with Sam..Sorry.. =)

-Sign Off @ 2:05 PM :)